A simple little project

It’s official. School is now out.
Forever.
Or something like that.
Which is why I’ve been so quiet this week: all the end of the year activities and such.
I did, however find time to make this cute little apron:
Twenty minute apron
There is a tutorial somewhere on this blog, but I couldn’t find it.
So, I’ll tell you myself but only if you promise to save your oohs and ahhs for her.

Twenty Minute Apron Tutorial
This project should take 20 minutes and cost $4 to make.
First, drive to Wal-mart.
While you are there try to find someone helpful alive to tell you where they keep bandannas.
When you fail to find anyone that meets the above criteria, just wander aimlessly through the store hoping to find them on your own.
While wandering through the store go ahead and fill up your cart with things that you just remembered that you need. Like toilet paper. And a humming bird feeder. And humming bird nectar. And bubbles, a green machine carpet cleaner, a trivet, seed packets, Old Maid and Go Fish, an Uno Bar, a new beach towel, two more beach towels, one more beach towel in case we have company and need an extra beach towel, and allergy medicine.
Finally, find and select one bandanna for your apron.
Next make your way to the fabric department and buy 1 yard of rick-rack and 1 1/2 – 2 yards of wide, unwired ribbon. (And also several yards of fabric from their bargain table for other projects you might do someday. And pom-poms, in case you need them.)
Walk to the cutting table and notice that there is no helpful blue-vest to be seen.
Ding the bell.

Ding the bell again.

Ding the bell again.

Consider leaving your full cart there and buying that super cute apron they are giving away on apronista.

Ding the bell one last time. Try to make it sound impatient.

Feel bad when the blue vest finally appears and inside it is a really sweet little old lady senior citizen and the only nice employee in the entire store.
Smile sweetly. Chat about your project. And remember to ask about her grandkids.
Feel guilty the entire time.
Wait patiently until she is finished and then wheel your full cart to the bank of registers.
Now it is decision time. Try to find a checker that does not look like he/she is on crack.
Consider, do they work at Wal-Mart to buy crack or do they buy crack because they work at Wal-Mart? Hmmm….
Select a checker and pay.
Cringe when your $4 project costs $150.
Drive home.
Cringe when you realize that the gas you just used probably added another $27 to the cost of your project.
Drag out your sewing machine or find a needle. Realize you forgot to buy matching thread but be grateful when you find some.
Sew by hand or machine the wide ribbon across the top of your bandanna for the ties and the rick-rack across the bottom for decoration.
Cringe when you realize that your 20 minute project took 3 hours.
Smile when you see how cute it is.
Decide to make another, right after you run to Wal-Mart for supplies.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
And that’s what works for me.

15 Comments

  1. I can relate to the “forever”! LOL! The kids were a little stir crazy today.

    gennys last blog post..Room Service, Anyone?

    Reply
  2. You crack me up. In my case it’s like 50 bucks for gas, Walmart is a whole 14 miles away. And every time we go there Mike sees too many of his “customers” for me to want to go by myself. (He’s a prosecutor)

    Actually, Jolenes last blog post..The Well Mud

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  3. I love the home made projects. As a beginning sewer I’m always looking for fun, relatively easy projects. I’m stocking up on supplies for my move – and saving your “tutorial”.

    Thanks!

    P.S. Love your shoes too…

    Jills last blog post..The Stork Got Lost on Ben Yehuda Street…

    Reply
  4. that is exactly how it would go if i tried to make that apron except mine may not turn out quite as cute! i did notice that you failed to metion where you finally found the bandanas 🙂 guess i’ll take the tour myslef! and find all of the other things i forgot to remember to put on my list.

    this is such a great idea though – a perfect gift too! thanks so much for sharing

    jenns last blog post..say hello to our little friend

    Reply
  5. Soliloquy loves Heidi and her sense of humor.

    Soliloquys last blog post..Damn Dogs

    Reply
  6. Ha ha, that sounds like my kind of project!!! And what is it about aprons at the moment – everyone seems to be making one right now!!

    Reply
  7. That is a great apron! Thanks for sharing! NCLM

    Kims last blog post..Upside Down Baby

    Reply
  8. super cute. now I want to try to make one. 🙂
    ~Amy

    Amys last blog post..Tagged

    Reply
  9. “Now it is decision time. Try to find a checker that does not look like he/she is on crack.
    Consider, do they work at Wal-Mart to buy crack or do they buy crack because they work at Wal-Mart? Hmmm….”

    LOL!! You crack me up!!!

    Aimees last blog post..Random Summer Stuff

    Reply

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