Adventures of Heidi – The City Bus

Once upon a time Heidi was 15 years old. Or maybe 14. Heidi does not recall.

I threw up on the bus

Heidi was aware that she was not cool. But she tried anyway.
Heidi was not aware that wearing your dad’s old sweater was not grunge. Just grungy.
Heidi was not old enough to drive, but that did not stop her. She had a ticket for freedom: The City Bus.
I threw up on the bus
Spellcheck informs Heidi that “chariots” was correct.

Heidi rode the city bus to the home of Dustin Clock, a super-cute boy that she had a crush on.
Dustin lived on the south end of town and was therefore rich.
Heidi basked in his richness for awhile.
But Heidi did not enjoy it so much.
Heidi’s head was achy. Heidi’s tummy felt weird.
Heidi took her ticket to freedom and went home.
She sat in the back of the bus because she was trying to social climb. But not in the last seat because she was not that cool.
Heidi was glad that the bus was nearly deserted, because she did not feel well at all.
But then the bus-driver stopped and picked up three cool girls.
They sat in the last seat.
Reasons they were cool:

But Heidi stayed calm. She told herself:
I threw up on the bus

But it was not true.
I threw up on the bus
Heidi realized that she left handicapped off the diagram. She is sorry.
She did not leave handi-caped off. Anyone, handi or not, wearing a cape sat with the druggies and crazies.

Heidi tried to play it cool, but Heidi’s stomach did not care. Heidi’s stomach was acting like its parents came home early and found a party. Heidi’s stomach was yelling “Oh crap! My parents are home! Everyone get out!”
Heidi had no other option. She leaned over her seat and…
Shocked silence from the cool girls.
Embarrassed silence from Heidi.
Heidi’s stomach was busy getting grounded.
Heidi did not know what to do, so she just wiped her mouth on the sleeve of her dad’s sweater and stared straight ahead for the rest of the ride.
That’s right. She played it cool.
I threw up on the bus


I threw up on the bus


  1. LOL I just love the way you tell stories!

  2. OMG πŸ™‚ That is a great story. But I have to wonder what happened to the puke?? Did passengers, for the rest of the day, have to step over it? Did the bus driver clean it up?
    I hope the three cool girls weren’t ones who knew you at school! If they weren’t then at least you could walk away from the situation.

  3. That’s an awesome story. But I thought plastic jewelry was cool! Or maybe I’m just older than you.

  4. I love vomit stories… someone ALWAYS vomits on a vacation… yes always!

    My favorite is when I vomited on the train going from London to Paris… in first class… all over me, my husband, the table… and spent the rest of the trip in the baggage car or the bathroom. So glad we spent the extra money for our comfort.

    Jills last blog post..A Girls Day of Styling and Profiling

  5. Melissa – I can only assume it rode to the terminal and then transferred to another bus. (On people’s shoes.) Luckily the girls were not from my school, but I bet they told everyone they knew about the anonymous “sick freak on the bus” anyway. I know I would have.

    Adither – This was 1990ish. If I recall, plastic jewelry had just gone out. It was replaced by leather, femo-beads, hemp and shells. At least at my school.

    Jill – Oh. No.

  6. I never had an opportunity to ride a city bus, just the school bus. My brother threw up on the school bus. Thanks for visiting my site!

    Kellys last blog post..Snake anyone?

  7. Oh, you poor girl! That is a terrible story, but the bus diagram cracked me up.

    I used to wear my dad’s old sweaters too. πŸ˜‰

    Jens last blog post..Help Me Redo My Bathroom

  8. You are awesome at telling stories! I feel for you and whether or not I ever saw those girls again, that would most definitely be a story I’d remember with embarrassment the rest of my life! πŸ™‚

    (Here from NCLM)

    Ms last blog post..The World through My Eyes

  9. Add that to my list of jobs I’d pay not to have.. City Bus Driver.

    Everyone else can get off the bus, right?


    Soliloquys last blog post..Whaaaaaat?!

  10. You know, even though this is a story about puke, its still a darned good one. I must say your artistry skills are impressive. You captured those “cool girls” and their shark hair PERFECTLY. :O)

    Thanks for playing along!

    Colleen – Mommy Always Winss last blog post..Weekly Winners – June 1-7, 2008

  11. I miss my Aqua Net mall bangs! πŸ˜‰

    DCs last blog post..Show and Tell

  12. I loved both of your stories Heidi. You make me proud. The only time I remember a barf story is your older brother. He wasn’t feeling very well one day when we went to the dentist. But I didn’t think he was sick. I just thought he didn’t want to go.

    As the dentist was looking in his mouth. He spued like a water fountain
    The dentist was wearing glasses. And it dripped down the lense and onto his face. Our visit was short.
    Many visits later I asked If he remembered that incident. He said how could I ever forget? Poor man.

    keep writing Heidi you do such a great job. love mom

  13. I love these stories! So different and fun to read! I love love love how well you drew the “cool girls”!

    Mars last blog post..My Spa experience

  14. OMG. That was funny. Poor Heidi.

    Love the handicaped leave off.

    Love the cool R us girls.

    Thankful Heidi didn’t sit in the engine.


    HRHs last blog post..Come visit me…

  15. I dropped by for NaComLeavMo and found a STORY … with PICTURES!!! How cool! Thanks for the great laugh – I’ve got to add you to my reader, if only for more Heidi stories! πŸ™‚

    Heathers last blog post..Tell Me About YOU … for a change



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